Rick Sanchez vs The Doctor

The Doctor travels the universe throughout space and time. Their primary means of doing so is the TARDIS, or Time and Relative Dimension in Space, a bigger-on-the-inside timeship that’s locked in a disguise as a police telephone box. While it usually disappears and reappears at its next destination, it’s also capable of flight, both in-atmosphere and in space. The TARDIS is also intelligent, though it rarely communicates in words - except that time it was a lady. For more conventional transport, the Doctor has tooled around in a few modified terrestrial vehicles, including a flying car and a roadster named Bessie (yes, really). Granted, the Doctor’s rides haven’t always been reliable, with their TARDIS in particular frequently arriving at random locales. Rick Sanchez’s most iconic means of conveyance is his portal gun. Firing it at a surface or even mid-air will create an opaque, green portal that can travel to anywhere in multiple universes. Instantaneous transport is incredibly convenient. However, for whatever reason, Rick also has a flying car of his own. The car has an A.I. that is both sassy and terrifying. Oh, and it’s heavily armed and powered by a miniature universe. However, a major downside to his portals is the fact that they’re not transparent, so he can’t see where he’s going, which has nearly cost Rick several times. Also, if Rick’s not driving, his car is a real handful. As cool as Rick’s rides are and as convenient as his portal gun is, the TARDIS is one of the most iconic time machines in fiction. Round 1 goes to the Doctor. The Doctor 1 / Rick Sanchez 0

The Doctor favors a number of gadgets during their adventures, most notably the sonic screwdriver. Its most frequent usage is for opening doors, but the Doctor has used it for everything from analyzing their environment to disarming complex devices. The Doctor has also used plenty of other minor gadgets, everything from an invisibility watch to time distortion detectors cobbled together from junk. They have also, on occasion used a vortex manipulator, which is technically a mode of transport, but it’s so small and infrequently used, it feels more like a gadget. However, as iconic as the Doctor’s sonic screwdriver is, it does have a major weakness: wood. On the other hand, Rick Sanchez is essentially Inspector Gadget. Along with his portal gun, Rick has a plethora of other technology at his disposal or that he can invent on the fly. While his creation of weaponry is certainly impressive (he made a laser gun powered by double-As!), Rick has numerous weapons inside his own body, having a ton of cybernetic modifications. Rick has also invented devices that can detect magic and he even created a child-proof wonderland in a pocket dimension for his daughter to play in. Rick’s many gadgets seemingly have no limit or limitations. However, constraints can be a good thing - remember that time a robot he invented destroyed all those planets? The Doctor 1 / Rick Sanchez 1

Round 3: Companions

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The Doctor has traveled with many people over the years. While the vast majority of them are humans from 20th and 21st century Earth, some are from the past, the future, other planets, or aliens. Sometimes they’ve been family, best friends, or love interests. There’s even been a robot dog! The Doctor’s companions often bring out the best in them, helping them see the universe through new eyes, or else reigning in their worst impulses. Some of the Doctor’s companions have even been popular enough to warrant spin-off shows of their own. Still, one common criticism that even the show acknowledges is that some of them are there to make the Doctor look good, rather than having agency of their own. Rick primarily goes on adventures with his grandson Morty, as well as the rest of his immediate family - his daughter Beth, granddaughter Summer, and, reluctantly, his son-in-law Jerry. Through their adventures with him, several of his family members have achieved more confidence and independence. Also, they tend to get to the heart of Rick’s many issues, helping him show more affection and work on improving himself. Rick also occasionally travels with various wacky characters from space, other dimensions, or Earth itself, which range from his best bud Birdperson to his love-hate relationship with the U.S. President. However, it’s undeniable that Rick often mistreats and traumatizes those around him. And they’re not without their own issues too. While both characters’ friends and loved ones bring out the best in them, the Doctor’s companions tend to be more successful at it, and have more time in the limelight. This match goes to the Doctor. The Doctor 2 / Rick Sanchez 1

The Doctor’s preferred method of conflict resolution is non-violence. But that doesn’t mean that they aren’t skilled in its application. When it comes to up close and personal combat, they’re skilled in Venusian aikido, as well as other martial arts. They may not like guns, but they can still handle them well. And all their technical knowledge means that they’ve handled explosives and other powerful weapons that range from the small to the doomsday level of destructive. The Doctor can also enact some creative and terrifying punishments when they have a mind to. Still, at the end of the day, the Doctor is just flesh and blood and they’re vulnerable to injury or death, provided you stop them from regenerating into a new body. As we’ve seen already, Rick Sanchez is basically a living weapon. His cyborg body has in-built weapons aplenty, possessing lasers, projectiles, and all manner of offensive might. He is also quite durable, having access to power armor and even protective shielding around his heart. Rick also uses guns, lots of guns, and a ton of wacky sci-fi gadgets that give him an edge in battle. He’s fought gods and killed by touch! Even death isn’t always a guarantee of stopping Rick, since he has several ways to revive himself, whether it’s through regrowing a body or transferring his consciousness. If Rick has one weakness in battle, it’s through being outmaneuvered or outsmarted, though there are precious few beings who can do that. While the Doctor has destroyed armies, villains, and entire races, we get the feeling that they would still have a tough time competing with Rick Sanchez, at least in direct combat. This round goes to Rick. The Doctor 2 / Rick Sanchez 2

Although among their own people, the Doctor wasn’t considered exceptionally smart, they have proven themselves to be a genius time and time again. While clearly brilliant enough to construct numerous complex devices, the Doctor’s true brains are for crisis management and strategy. For thousands of years, they’ve overcome nearly every challenge they’ve come up against. Nearly every enemy they have has them beat when it comes to force, yet the Doctor always manages to outwit even their most cunning foes. They also possess remarkable emotional intelligence, with their compassion for even their worst enemies proving as invaluable as pure brains. But even the cleverest Time Lord can have lapses in judgment or get outsmarted on occasion. Rick Sanchez is the smartest being in many universes. The man once built himself limbs in a sewer after turning himself into a pickle! He built a fully intelligent robot just to pass him butter! Rick runs rings around most people since he’s usually smarter and better prepared than everyone around him. But Rick’s brilliance is often a double-edged sword. While he’s mind-bogglingly intelligent, Rick doesn’t always think through the consequences of his actions. When he does make a mistake, the consequences can be literally world-ending. And even if Rick is aware he’s a cartoon, his self-awareness could use some work. If we’re talking raw intelligence, Rick could be smarter. But, for all of Rick’s smarts, he’s not very wise. Our final round and the match go to the Doctor.